Last night after I finished writing, I decided to check some of my sales ranking. I never imagined it would lead to a major PR hassle for Amazon. I noticed a little ad next to the price of my book for "KindleUnlimited." a new $9.99 all-you-can-read-service.
Thinking I must be the only one not to know of this new offering, I posted a note on Kindleboards with a link to the page. When I woke up this morning the story had exploded with articles all over the web about this mysterious new service that had disappeared as quickly as it had popped up. Time and Slashdot were just a few of the news sites that covered it.
In light of all the problems I've been having with Amazon, it's safe to say they're probably not exactly thrilled with me. So I've decided to write them an open letter in an effort to clear the air:
Dear Amazon,
Let me publicly apologize for inadvertently spoiling--please don't ban my account--the announcement of your exciting, and wonderful new program, Amazon Unlimited. Which I am positive will be wildly successful--please don't ban my account--for both readers and writers.
As a show of my sincerity--please don't ban my account--I would like to offer my first-born son to work in one of your huge, but employee friendly warehouses, where I am sure he will have the opportunity to learn valuable job skills.
In closing, I hope you accept my sincere regret for letting the cat out of the bag--please don't ban my account--and that you don't harbor any ill feelings toward me.
You sincere and humble servant,
MJ Ware
Did they accept your offer? Those warehouses are brutal. But, hey, you can always have another kid... thanks for the laugh anyway.
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